by clicking the "Next" arrow.
by clicking on the page.
the page around when zoomed in by dragging it.
the zoom using the slider when zoomed-in.
by clicking on the zoomed-in page.
by entering text in the search field, and select "This Issue" or "All Issues"
by clicking on thumbnails to select pages, and then press the print button.
displays sections with thumbnails and descriptions.
displays a slider of thumbnails. Click on a page to jump.
allows you to browse the full archive.
about your subscription?
Mindful : December 2014
Self-kindness helps us take the perspective of an “other” toward ourselves. It lets in a breath of fresh air, so we see our pain from a different— more detached—vantage point. in internal dialog ues that are benevolent and encouraging rather than cruel or disparaging. Instead of attacking and berating ourselves for being inadequate, we offer ourselves warmth and unconditional acceptance. Similarly, when external life circumstances are challenging and difficult to bear, self-compassion involves active self-soothing and support. This means that when our emotional cup is full, we have more resources available to give to others. Self-kindness helps us take the perspective of a n “other” toward ourselves, so we see our pain from a different point of view. It lets in a breath of fresh air, so the toxicity of our pain is not so all-consuming. When we adopt the role of a kind friend to a person in need (i.e., ourselves), we’re no longer totally iden- tified with the role of the one who is suffering. Yes, I hurt. But I also feel care and concern. I am both the comforter and the one in need of comfort. There is more to me than the pain I’m feeling right now, I am also the heartfelt response to that pain. And holding our suffering with love allows us to bear our struggles in life with greater ease. 2 COMMON HUMANITY The second essential element of self-compassion is recognition of our common huma nity. Compassion mea ns “to suffer with,” indicating a basic mutual- ity in the experience of suffering. It honors the fact that everyone experiences pain, no matter who they are. This is what distinguishes self-compassion from self-pity. While self-pity says “poor me,” self-com- passion recognizes suffering is part of the shared human experience. The pain I feel in difficult times is the sa me pain that you feel in difficult times. The triggers a re different, the circumstances are dif- ferent, the degree of pain is different, but the basic experience is the same. Sadly, however, most of us don’t focus on what we have in common with others, especially when we feel ashamed or inadequate. Rather than framing our imperfection in light of the shared human expe- rience, we’re more likely to feel isolated and discon- nected from others when we fail. Our perspective → December 2014 mindful 77 in practice insight Personal Retreat Weekend A Time for Silence and Refection January 2 - 4 Dr. Mark Bertin Heal Thyself: A Mindfulness Weekend for Health Care Practitioners January 9 - 11 Sharon Salzberg, Ali and Atman Smith Health and Healing: Contemplative Care for Caregivers February 13 - 15 Bob Doppelt The Leadership and Resilience Workshop February 20 - 22 Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche Enlightened Leadership: Becoming a Force for Positive Change February 27 - March 1 Madeline Klyne, La Sarmiento and Eric Kolvig Embodying Presence in Our Lives: A Mindfulness Meditation Retreat for the LGBTIQ Communities April9-12 For our full calendar of more than 70 retreats and programs in the year ahead, check our website. garrisoninstitute.org Garrison Institute, Rt. 9D, Garrison, NY Tel: 845.424.4800 Building a more compassionate, resilient future